The Statist's Creed
We believe in one State,
the Father, the Almighty,
maker of all that is good and just,
of all that is, seen and unseen.
We believe in one Ruler, the Lord Bill Clinton,
the only Son of State,
eternally begotten of the State,
State from State, Light from Light,
true State from true State,
begotten, not made,
of one Being with the State.
Through him all things were made.
For us men and for our salvation
he came down from Little Rock:
by the power of the Mighty Vote
he became incarnate from the Ballot Box,
and was made Ruler.
For our sake he was crucified under a Right-wing Conspiracy;
he suffered humiliation and was impeached.
On the third day he rose again
in accordance with the Constitution;
he ascended into the Oval Office
and is seated at the right hand of the State.
He will come again in glory to rule the living and the dead,
and his kingdom will have no end.
We believe in Clinton, the Ruler, the giver of life,
who proceeds from the State and the Ballot Box.
With the State and the Vote he is worshiped and glorified.
He has spoken through the Prophets.
We believe in one holy Ruler and State.
We acknowledge one State for the forgiveness of sins.
We look for the resurrection of the Total State Domination,
and the life of the world to come. Amen.